


Crush

by Trashness



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Domesticity, First Crush, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, Post-Canon, Sharing a Bed, adjusting to normal life is hard, but like everything ended fine, god you know I wrote it if they share a bed, help sora he's stupid, making friends is hard, oblivious boys, post kh3, what are these feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-11
Updated: 2019-09-20
Packaged: 2020-08-19 02:55:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20202580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trashness/pseuds/Trashness
Summary: "Sora have you ever had a crush on anyone?""Hm? Nah. Never. I don't think so."Roxas chokes and splutters before he turns on the other boy with wild eyes."What are you talking about? Of course you do?!"Or that time Sora got bullied in to actually having to reflect on his own feelings and relationship with his best friend.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is a birthday present for my good friend ForsakenAngel88! I'm still having a great time in this fandom and it's all because of her. Be sure to check out her Kingdom hearts art on her Tumblr, Instagram and twitter @forsakenangel88

On top of the Twilight Town clock tower, the afternoon sun feels warm on Sora’s cheeks. The wind carries with it the distant sound of shops closing and people leaving their jobs for the day. Sora lazily watches from his vantage point, whilst his ice scream melts and sticks between his fingers. He kicks his legs back and forth idly, eventually matching the rhythm of the boy next to him. Roxas laughs as their kicks sync up. He hums a song under his breath, and changes the rhythm of his kicks to match the beat of the song. Xion sings with him. Sora loses the pace.

“What’s that song?” Sora smacks his lips after licking a stripe up his ice cream.

“Some song Hayner taught me. Everyone at school knows it. They play it at lunch all the time and make up stupid dances to it and stuff.” Roxas explains. 

“Does your school have anything like that?”

“Mmmm…” Sora looks off into the distance. “Maybe? I’m not sure.”

Roxas narrows his eyes. It’s odd for Sora to be so quiet. Usually he would excitedly be bouncing on the spot, explaining everything as if it were the most wonderful and marvellous event ever experienced.

“How was school today?” He presses.

Sora looks down and clears his throat. His fingers fiddle with the zipper on his black and red jacket, the one he always wears to keyblade training. He takes a big bite of his ice cream. He doesn’t answer.

“Sora,” Roxas insists.

“I didn’t go.” Sora mumbles around his mouthful. He swallows and his lips shrink into a guilty pout. He slumps forward.

“You ditched?”

“Yeah.”

“Soraaaa,” Roxas groans. He leans back on his hands and scowls. Xion turns a sympathetic smile towards Sora. She proceeds cautiously.

“Do you not like school?” She asks.

Sora shrugs.

“I dunno. It’s just…. hard to go back.” Sora’s pout falters and he manages to cobble together a bright smile. “Besides! It’s so boring!” He laughs. He happily kicks his dangling feet.

“Yeah, it might not be life threatening every day, but I think that’s why I like it.” Roxas shrugs.

“It’s nice to be a normal kid for a while. It’s relaxing to have a routine and low stakes.”

“And it’s nice to see your friends every day.” Xion adds. Roxas nods.

Sora smiles warmly, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. The final dregs of his ice cream crumble and fall over the edge.

“Also,” Axel finally sits up. He had been lying back on the cement, baking in the sunlight enjoying the last rays before nightfall.

“You gotta get an education. You can’t let _Roxas _become the smartest Sora knock off.” He smirks. Xion scoffs.

“Um, excuse me? I think _I _am the smartest Sora kid.” She huffs.

“Oh my apologies, Xion. I measure you on a completely different scale.” He gives a dramatic bow from his seated position. Xion turns her nose up and answers with a queenly wave.

“You are forgiven, peasant.” A smile pulls at her lips. Axel chuckles and winks back.

Sora watches Roxas’ and Xion’s little family with fondness. He’s happy to see the lives they have carved out here in Twilight Town unfold before them. They slip in so nicely to the daily life here, that it almost feels like Roxas and Xion _always _existed. They go to school and hang out with Hayner and the others like they have known them for years, then return to their small apartment that Axel rents to enjoy family dinners and slumber parties with all their friends. Even Isa is starting to look like part of the furniture. The warm orange skies and sounds of laughter have softened his hard edges over time.

Sora wonders when he started to feel like an outsider in Destiny Islands. He and Riku stand out against the town like sharp pieces of coral on a soft, white sand beach. He’s trying to slip neatly back into his old life, but it feels like there in no hole there to fill anymore. His name is whispered among his classmates with only the faintest recollection. An almost forgotten memory on the tip of their tongues. He exists again, with no ceremony or sense that someone was ever missing.

Isa stands. Axel watches him with curious eyes as he kneels beside Sora. He stares over the horizon. 

“It’s not going to be what you remember, but maybe you can still find something enjoyable about your boring life. You can connect with people afresh. Or just take it slow and appreciate the time you have to yourself.” 

Isa turns his green eyes onto the small boy. Sora inhales sharply. He feels like Isa’s gaze pierces straight through him and it leaves him wide eyed. 

“Alright,” Isa stands and stretches out his back. “I promised I’d meet up with Ienzo this afternoon. So I’ve gotta head off.” He walks behind them and gives Axel a soft nudge with his foot.

“I’ll be by at seven to pick you up.”

“Alright. See ya then.” Axel waves him off. Xion and Roxas mumble their goodbyes around their last bites of ice cream. The door closes with a soft thud and Isa is out of sight and earshot. Roxas immediately wheels on his friend.

“What’s at seven?” His eyes narrow.

“Nothing. We’re just getting dinner.” Axel shrugs.

“Dinner?” Xion sits up straight. “Like a date?”

“No! We’re just hanging out. It’s just food. We’re just going out to be away from _you _children.” Axel speaks quickly and with rehearsed defences.

“Yeah, so you can make out.” Roxas chuckles.

“We’re not going to make out.” Axel hisses.

“So you’re not getting back together?”

“Stop prying into my private life!”

“It’s hardly private with the way you openly stare at his ass.”

Axel freezes with a croak from his open mouth and his eyes shoot wide. His shock fades after a breath and he leans menacingly forward with a dark glint in his eyes. 

“How did someone so rotten come from such a sweet angel like Sora?”

Roxas turns with a sharp smile. His canines glisten.

“Because _you _raised me.”

Axel throws up his hands in defeat with a loud huff. Roxas laughs. 

Sora’s eyes dart between the two with a mixture of confusion and amusement. The puzzle pieces in his head are slow to align. Xion takes pity on him. She scoots close to him and whispers loud enough for the others to hear. 

“Axel and Saix used to date.” She comically cups her hand like she’s spreading gossip on the playground. Sora shoots up straight. 

“What?!” He squawks. He leans forward with a delighted smile, pushing Roxas out of his view of Axel. 

“You were boyfriends?!”

“Aw, Jesus.” Axel rubs his face with an exasperated sigh. “Yes.” He leans back on his hands and shoots Sora a bored expression. Sora’s enthusiasm does not break.

“How long ago? What was it like?!” Sora inches closer and closer until he is practically sandwiching Roxas in between himself and Axel. The blonde squirms, but is unable to free himself.

Axel sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He pulls a leg up and hugs it to his chest, before resting his cheek on his knee.

“I dunno, we were kids. About your age actually.” He chuckles quietly under his breath. A soft smile appears on his lips. “But I think I had a crush on him since I first met him. We broke up pretty quickly after the whole _nobody_ business. Not having a heart seemed to affect Isa pretty badly, and I wasn't exactly patient or caring either.” He shrugs.

“It’s… _complicated _now.”

Sora hangs on his every word. He’s never known anyone to have actually dated before. His head is still filled with the lofty ideals that he heard in fairy tales and watched in old movies. Romantic, but often unrealistic.

“Wow, that sounds nice though.” He sinks against Roxas’ side. “I’ve always wanted to have a crush on someone.”

“You haven’t?” Axel raises a disbelieving brow.

“No, I don’t think so.”

Roxas stiffen under Sora’s words and he inhales so sharply that he launches into a coughing fit. 

“What?” He croaks. He coughs a few more times before he pushes the rest of his words out with a wheeze. 

“Yes you have!”

Sora sits up. His brows knit together and his forehead wrinkles in confusion.

“Oh!” He waves dismissively. “Kairi? No I don’t think that was like a real crush. I was just a kid, you know?”

“No, you idiot, I’m talking about-“

Roxas is yanked backwards by Xion, who has scrambled over during his and Sora’s back and forth. He makes a strangled sound and Xion lets go of his collar to grasp him by the shoulders.

“Don’t! He needs to realise it for himself!” She hisses in his ear. Roxas winces.

“But he’s stupid!”

“Yeah, but you can’t push him.”

Sora looks on owlishly at their small meeting. Xion turns over her shoulder and nervously smiles. 

“You’ve never had a crush, Sora?” Her voice sounds light and friendly. A stark contrast to the aggressive hissing she had just been emitting.

“Nope.” Sora shakes his head. 

“How can you be so sure?”

“I guess… I can’t?” He laughs and rubs the back of his neck. “Hey Axel!” He calls across the row. “What does a crush feel like?”

Axel sends Xion a cold scowl for getting him dragged into this lecture. He mentally notes he needs to stop hanging out with teenagers so much.

“Well,” He sighs and pulls up his legs to cross them. If he’s going to educate these kids about the ways of the world, he should at least try to do so thoroughly and responsibly.

“It feels like… being with that person is so much better than being without them. When you’re together, you get butterflies and they push you to be your very best. Sometimes you might even get jealous.” He chuckles.

“Like you want to monopolise them a bit. You get suspicious of people they talk to, because what if they like them more than _you? _You want them to like _you _the best.” Axel begins to soften and he starts to grasp with his hands, like he's reaching for the right words. 

“When they touch you… your skin lights up. You’ll notice things about them that you won’t notice about other people. The way they brush their hair, tie their shoes… things like that.”

He leans forward with a smirk.

“Oh yeah, and a pretty easy way to tell? You wanna kiss them.” He leans his chin into his hand and looks past Sora, at something in the distance only he can see.

“Like _really _badly. Some people will talk about other sexy stuff, but I think the best crushes are the ones where you daydream of nothing else but just kissing them.”

He blinks and breaks out of his reminiscing.

“Does that make sense?”

Sora nods. He commits all of Axel’s points into a finely organised mental list. Xion pokes Axel’s shoulder.

“I didn’t realise you were so mushy on the inside.” She teases.

“Don’t tell anyone.” Axel chuckles.

The group is quiet for a few moments, letting Axel’s romantic musings sink in against the vibrant pink and gold sky. The tips of Axel’s ears have turned red, but no one mentions it. Soft footfalls echo from behind them. The group turns just in time to see the door to the stairs open. Riku steps into the sunlight. His white collared shirt is rumpled, with only the front of it tucked into his blue plaid pants. He walks out with his hands deep in his pockets and shoots Sora a disapproving look.

“Nice pants.” Roxas giggles.

“Thanks. They are my _school _uniform.” Riku turns his icy gaze on Sora pointedly when he says the word ‘school’. 

“Sora would be wearing them too _if _he went to school today.” Riku walks over to Sora and places his arms on the top of Sora’s spiky head. He leans with all of his weight. Sora shrinks under him. The guilt forces him down another couple of inches. 

“You ditched.” Riku states.

“Aw man, Riku…” Sora starts to whine.

“You know, Kairi thought better of you. ‘Maybe he really is sick? Maybe he ate too many chocolates on the weekend’ she kept saying, but I knew I’d find you here.” He stands up, letting Sora spring back up. He turns to Roxas.

“Did he spend the whole day with you guys?”

“Nah, we actually went to school.” Roxas answers. Riku looks at Xion for confirmation. She nods. He sighs.

“You know when you ditch you leave _me _alone too, right?” Riku crosses his arms over his chest. Sora winces. It’s childish, but Riku is going to lay this guilt on as thickly as he can. He knows Sora would never do anything to make someone else suffer. Maybe this feeling of guilt and shame will actually keep him in school.

“It’s bad enough having to go to boring school, but at least I get to see you there. Without you I feel so lonely and isolated. No one else talks to me.” Riku pouts and leans against the wall. Sora scrambles to his feet and trots to his side.

“Oh, Riku, I’m sorry. I never thought about that.” He sounds genuinely upset. Riku almost feels bad for manipulating him so easily. He smirks. He throws his arm around Sora’s shoulders and pulls him into an almost headlock.

“We need to head off. I brought you your homework.”

“Aw!” Sora squirms out of his hold, only to drape his arms over Riku’s neck and let his legs sag. Riku holds him up with one arm around his waist.

“Nooooo! Riku, why did you go do that?” He whines and rubs his head into Riku’s chest. Riku pats his head.

“C’mon, if we make it back quickly I’ll help you with it.”

Sora looks up with pleading eyes.

“Will you stay for dinner?”

“Only if you finish.”

“Ugh!” Sora pushes himself off and begins to march towards the door. “Fine, fine, let’s go.”

Riku chuckles to himself. He turns and waves back to the others, reminding Sora to say goodbye as well. He waves with a cheerful smile and promises to visit soon. Riku ushers him through the door and it closes with a soft thud.

“Hey Rox,” Axel’s voice cuts through the silence once the footsteps have grown quiet. He stares thoughtfully out towards the creeping purple sunset.

“Hmm?” Roxas answers.

“Sora is like… desperately in love with Riku, isn’t he?” Axel asks.

Something snaps in Roxas’ serene expression and he turns towards his oldest friends with a manic look in his eyes.

“Axel… I say this as one of three people who are _intimately _acquainted with Sora’s wants and desires because I _LIVED IN HIS HEART _for a while, so trust me when I say that YES! - ” He huffs.

“Yes! Sora has a ginormous all consuming crush on Riku!” He pants. Xion pats him on the back in solidarity. 

“Yeah I figured as much.” Is Axel’s only reply.

…

Riku always pilots the ship when it’s just the two of them, and he makes it back to Destiny Islands in record time. He walks with purpose towards Sora’s house. Sora drags his feet behind him. They enter his house and take up their usual spot in his bedroom. It’s a large space, with not only the usual bed and dresser, but it also has a small work table that three or four people could sit around, a small computer desk, and an old tv with a games console plugged in. A couple of bean bags sag in front of the tv. It’s a large space, comfortable and familiar, making it an ideal base for Sora and Riku when they are not at school or training.

Riku spreads his books out on the work table and he tugs Sora down into the seat next to him.

“You have an essay due for English next Friday. Have you started it?” Riku flips through his text book. Sora’s eyes shift nervously to the side.

“Uhhh…”

“Yeah, I thought so.” Riku sighs. He pulls Sora’s English book out of his bag and pushes it across the table towards its owner.

“Have you even finished reading the book yet?”

“UHHHH”

Wordlessly, and without breaking eye contact, Riku produces the crib notes for Sora’s assigned text. He slides it over.

“Read.” He orders.

“H-how do you know all this?” Sora stutters.

“I’ll never give up my informant.” Riku smirks.

“Kairi told you, didn’t she?”

“READ.” Riku insists more forcefully.

“Fine! Fine.” Sora opens the crib notes and makes a show of intently reading it. Riku smiles. He turns his math text book to the assigned questions and begins to rule up a fresh page in his exercise book. His pencil scratches lightly as he methodically works through the problems.

“When you’ve finished reading you’ll have to draft up an essay plan. Just dot points is fine.” He speaks quietly over his work. Sora looks up from his reading. 

“Will you help me with it?” He asks nervously. Riku smiles. He finally picks his gaze up from his own work to meet Sora’s eyes. He smiles.

“Of course.”

“Thanks.” Sora relaxes. The bubble of anxiety beginning to swell in his stomach pops. He leans back in his chair.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Fail, probably.” 

Riku tries his best to keep his deadpan expression, but he finally crumbles. He chuckles and licks his lips, causing them to glisten. Sora stares at his mouth for a moment, transfixed by the shape of his smile. He blinks and whips his notes over Riku’s head.

“You’re terrible.” He pouts. Riku’s giggles do not stop.

Sora does manage to finish reading and is able to cobble together a semi coherent argument for his essay. Riku takes a break from his calculus to have a look over the plan. He makes suggestions for stronger wording, more concise statements, and clearer comments.

“This topic sentence is weird. I’m not sure what you’re trying to say.” Riku squints at the scrawl of the paper. 

“It’s just… I think the author deliberately reflects the characters’ emotions and motivations in the setting, you know? Like It’s always raining when the main character feels confused, and when he’s feeling neglected, he’s always in his big mansion which they make a point of talking about how empty it is. Stuff like that.”

“So just write that.” Riku chuckles.

“Just write that. What you just said. ‘The author uses the setting to reflect the characters’ emotions and motivations. That’s your topic sentence.”

“Oh…” Sora perks up. “Ok!”

His pencil jots down the new sentence and he’s back at tweaking his closing arguments. He finishes and hands it over for Riku’s final approval. Riku nods and ruffles Sora’s hair.

“There. I knew you could do it in time.”

Dinner is called soon afterwards and the two boys eat quickly. Riku does not mention that Sora skipped school. His parent’s do not need to know. Telling them would just stress them out about their son even more. He just has to keep Sora’s attendance up for the rest of the year. Sora manages to fake a conversation about his day at school enough to fool the. They quickly finish eating, clean their dishes, and scurry back to the sanctity of Sora’s bedroom. Sora flops onto his bed with a bounce. Riku takes a gentle seat next to him. Small fingers tangle in the hem of his shirt.

“You staying over?” Sora tugs. Riku follows the pull and sits further on the bed.

“I’m here all the time.” He laughs. “I’ve gotta see _my _parents sometimes too, you know.”

“Then I’ll come to your place!” Sora sits up with a brilliant smile and a bounce. He tucks his legs underneath him. 

“Your bed is bigger anyway. I always sleep better there.”

“Sora,” Riku rolls his eyes. “You can’t just invite yourself over.”

“I’m not inviting myself, I just thought…”

Sora’s voice trails off. His smile fades and his eyes look downcast. Something cold and fearful begins to churn in his stomach. Thoughts that he’s pushed aside for months now begin to appear in his mind like shadows. Waiting for their chance to consume him. He wraps his arms around his chest.

Riku looks on as Sora shrinks in on himself and immediately senses the change in atmosphere. He slips himself into Sora’s space and places his hands on his shoulders in a reassuring and grounding gesture.

“Sora,” He calls.

Sora’s eyes snap up.

“We’ve been staying with each other every night since… uh…” Riku flicks his eyes to the side. “Well since we got back. And I’m fine with it, but… I’m worried.” He sighs and gives Sora’s shoulder a squeeze. 

“What’s wrong? I feel like you’re scared to be on your own.” His hand travels upwards and he starts to idly stroke his fingers through Sora’s hair. It relaxes Sora and he shifts closer. With a frown, he rolls forwards and thumps his head against Riku’s chest. His thin arms follow and circle around Riku’s waist. He breathes deeply, inhaling the strong scent of sandalwood and bergamot. It’s familiar and eases Sora’s worries.

“I’m not scared to be on my own.” Sora mutters, sending vibrations through Riku’s chest. He squeezes his friend tighter. Riku’s fingers scratch against his scalp and he closes his eyes. The warmth and solidity of his best friend is grounding, and he can’t deny that Riku’s presence has kept him tethered during this confusing period. His presence is an immense source of comfort. Largely because he is the only one who could possibly understand what Sora is going through… but also because Sora can so vividly remember what his absence felt like. The ache of reaching out his hand and finding no one there. 

“Scared you’ll leave again. Scared we’ll be separated… somehow.” Sora confesses. Riku’s hands still. Sora sharply inhales, thinking he’s crossed a line, but Riku’s hands start to move to his lower back. He pulls Sora into him, until the smaller boy is seated in his lap and his face is tucked into the crook of his neck. Riku’s fingers trail up and down his spine. Goosebumps rise underneath his touch. 

“I get it.” Riku whispers. “I worry I’ll turn around and you won’t be there. That I’ll still be in the darkness, or you’ll be trapped somewhere.”

“I’ve gotta keep an eye on you.” Sora chuckles humourlessly. Riku hums. It sends a pleasant thrum between their chests. 

“So will you stay?” Sora’s voice is small and feather light in Riku’s ear. He shudders. 

“Mmmm, come to my place. It’s hot and I can spread out more there.”

“Okay.”

Riku feels Sora’s smile as it is pressed against his pulse.

…

The sea breeze is cool and pleasant on Sora and Riku’s walk to school in the morning, and there is a pleasant bounce in Sora’s step. He hums some song under his breath and purposely bumps his shoulder into Riku’s several times. Riku smirks and bumps him back, knocking him off balance for a step.

“Ugh, no fair. You’re so much bigger than me.”

“I’m sorry, I can’t hear you all the way down there. You’ll have to speak up.” Riku laughs. Sora whips off his backpack and attempts to swing it around his body like a throwing hammer. Riku easily steps out of the way and laughs harder. He starts to jog down the beach with Sora shouting and chasing after him. They are playfully hitting each other when a high pitched bell trings behind them. They jump off the path and a bike comes to roll between them. Kairi kicks down her foot and skids to a halt.

“Well good to see _both _of you this morning.” She smiles at the boys.

“I sure hope you’re over your _cold, _Sora. I know you hate getting sick.” She grins sharply at her friend. Sora sighs and sheepishly smiles.

“Riku told you?”

“Of course Riku told me, you liar.” She softly kicks Sora in the side before rolling forward at a slow pace. Sora and Riku walk quickly to keep up. 

“Well… would it make you happy to know I actually did my homework?” Sora tries.

“Really?” Kairi laughs. “I feel like I’m in the twilight zone.”

“Well I did! And I’m not going to ditch school any more. That’s my new promise!” He places a hand over his heart. “… unless Riku comes with me.”

Riku rolls his eyes and sends Kairi a sympathetic look.

“Well I trust Riku to keep you in check, so I look forward to your more consistent attendance.” She smiles. 

They arrive at their school and part ways with Riku, with promises to meet up for lunch. Kairi and Sora go to park Kairi’s bike and then swing by their lockers to pick up their books for the first few periods. It’s a struggle for Sora to stay awake, despite Kairi chiding him throughout the lesson. By second period he is feeling more awake and manages to absorb part of his history lesson. Enough to take notes and remember some key points. 

After recess and getting some food into his stomach, he feels much more himself. 

“What do we have now?” Sora asks at his locker as the bell rings. Kairi is at her own locker a few bays down. 

“Maths”

“Ugh.” Sora grabs his exercise book and waits for Kairi to pull out her supplies. 

“You’d know your schedule if you were here more.” She smirks.  
“Yeah, yeah.” 

They leave their hall of lockers and begin to walk up the stairs to the second floor walkway. It’s open and catches the summer breeze, making it a popular place to just stop and cool down on hot days. It is relatively empty now, with most students having scuffled off to class already, but a trio of girls still leans over the railing. Sora recognises them from his classes, but cannot recall their names. They look down at the oval below. They point and whisper between themselves as they watch a PE lesson currently in progress. The students below run laps and a whistle trills.

“So glad I dropped PE as soon as I could.” One girl muses. 

“Even though you miss out on seeing Brad play water polo?”

“I mean… have you never noticed that I always ask to go to the bathroom in fifth period?”

“_That’s _what you’re doing?”

“Hahaha, yeah.”

“I always assumed you had to shit or something you were taking so long.”

The two girls giggle at this, but the third seems focussed on something. Her eyes narrow on one of the PE students and she lightly nudges her friend.

“Hey… who’s _that_?”

“Hmmm? Oh, haha, _Riku_?”

At the sound of his friend’s name, Sora screeches to a halt. Kairi stops beside him. He turns to take a closer look down at the oval and, sure enough, a tall boy with silver hair is running strong out in front of the bulk of the class. His long legs stretch out effortlessly and the longer parts of his hair flutter beside his ears. But overall he looks… bored. Sora huffs out a weak chuckle.

“He’s so pretty… and HOT. You guys know anything about him? Is he new?” The girl with the auburn hair tied up in pigtails remains transfixed. Sora’s eyes snap to watch her dreamy expression.

The friend who knew Riku’s name starts to chuckle. She rolls her eyes. 

“No, he’s not new. Just kinda… transient?”

“Transient?”

“Like I think he was on exchange for a while? Then maybe off with relatives? He just pops in and out a lot. But yeah… he’s hot. You should see his arms up close. If you’re lucky he usually wears a tank top around town.” She sighs. “I wouldn’t mind standing here and watching him run laps all day.”

Sora’s mouth tastes sour. His jaw clenches.

“What’s he like?” The girl with pigtails asks.

“Aloof. Cold. Beautiful.” Her friend laughs. “Good luck ever trying to talk to him.”

“Oh I will. I _will _talk to him. And he will find me both interesting _and _charming.” Pigtails announces with determination. Her friends giggle. Something resembling fear clenches Sora’s insides.

_What if they like them more than _you_? _

Axel’s words ring in his head with shocking clarity. He dismisses them. This has nothing to do with crushes or anything. He’s been Riku’s most important person for years, and he’s sure he’ll continue to be.

_You want to monopolise them. _

Sora sets his jaw in a hard scowl and starts to leave. Kairi follows at his side. Her fingers brush against his momentarily in a friendly supportive gesture.

“Does he have any friends? Maybe I can get a word in that way.”

“I don’t know. He’s a bit of a loner.” Her friend pauses to think. “I think I’ve seen him talking to Kairi before?”

“Kairi?” Pigtails squawks. She wheels around on her heel just in time to come face to face with Kairi.

“Aw crap.” Kairi whispers under her breath. “Yes, Olivia?”

“That Riku guy!” Olivia points wildly over her shoulder. Riku has stopped running laps and is taking a drink from his water bottle. His adam’s apple bobs as he swallows. 

“You know him?”

“Uhhhh….” Kairi’s eyes nervously dart between Sora and Olivia. She shrugs. 

“Yeah? We’re pretty good friends I guess?”

“Really? What’s he like? Is he nice? Or is he an asshole?” Olivia starts her interrogation. Kairi steps back.

“No, no he’s uh…” She swallows. “Sora is actually much closer to him than I am! They walk to school together everyday.”

Olivia pauses at this. She turns her gaze to Sora and quickly appraises him, like it’s the first time she’s even noticed him. She quirks an eyebrow skeptically.

“Really?”

“Yeah.” Kairi confirms. “They went on … _exchange _together.” She fumbles to remember what their latest lie for missing school is.

“Oh!” Olivia smiles. “Well I guess that makes sense then.”

She begins to rummage around in her pencil case and pulls out a stack of post it notes. She scrawls on a blank one and hands it over to Sora. 

“Could you give this to him?”

Sora looks at the note. It has her name. And her phone number. He blinks at it.

“Why?” 

Olivia laughs.

“So he can message me. He seems cool, I wanna get to know him.”

Sora takes the note and pockets it.

“Make sure to tell him I’m cute, ok?” Olivia giggles and winks. Sora looks back blankly. 

“Uh sure.”

Sora leaves towards his class with Kairi in tow. The girls behind begin to tease their friend and laugh as they wander in the opposite direction. The note feels heavy in his pocket.

“You gonna actually give that to him?” Kairi asks as they walk into their class. Sora takes up his seat in the back corner, with Kairi next to him.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Just wondering.”

…

Riku swings by their class still in his gym gear just as the bell rings for lunch. Students are supposed to change back into their formal uniforms as soon as their class finishes, but Riku pushes it as long as he can. He hates the long and hot formal trousers and how he has to keep his shirt tucked in. Few teachers reprimand him, or even see him as he lounges on the roof of the school in his basketball shorts and t-shirt. He tosses a pack of m&ms each to Kairi and Sora, and they enjoy their lunch in the relative peace and quiet. 

Kairi does not mention the group of girls who had been eyeing her friend. Sora also stays quiet. They talk about classes, meeting up with friends on the weekend, and some funny video Aqua had sent them. 

The number remains in Sora’s pocket.

…

The final bell of the day rings and all students let out a sigh of relief. Sora sinks in his chair as the other students rush around him to escape. He closes his eyes in a moment of reprieve until he hears a familiar voice. 

“You ready to go?”

Sora opens his eyes. Riku stands in the doorway, leaning against the frame. His arms are crossed over his chest and he wears a confident smile. Sora beams. He hops up onto his feet and swings his backpack onto his shoulder. He skips up to Riku, who immediately wraps an arm around his shoulders and escorts him into the halls.

“You got your English books on you?”

“Yup yup!” Sora grins up at his friend. Riku immediately smiles back, finding Sora’s affection contagious. He pulls Sora closer.

“Alright, well let's head home so we can start that.”

They walk home along the boardwalk, listening as the squeals and chatter of teenagers eventually becomes the quiet lull of ocean waves. Riku keeps his arm around Sora the entire walk home, despite the heat of the afternoon. Sora preens under the attention. He leans his head against Riku’s shoulder and tries to match his steps. They pause for a moment to buy ice cream and lean against the wooden fence that keeps pedestrians from trampling over the sand dunes. The frozen treat is cheap and objectively more icey than creamy, but on a hot day after school with your best friend, it tastes like absolute heaven. Sora hops up after finishing his last bite. His shoes sink into the sand.

“Here I’ll take your trash.” He smiles and holds out his hand. Riku hands him his napkin and wrapper.

Sora trots over to the nearby can and drops the wrappers in. He also reaches into his pocket to take out the long empty m&m packet Riku gave him at lunch. He pulls it out and a small yellow note flutters to the ground.

Olivia’s number stares up at him, tauntingly.

“We need to hurry if you want to have any time to play video games.” Riku teases.

Sora scrambles to pick up the note.

He drops it into the trash with all of the other waste.

…

This afternoon they choose to work on Sora’s bedroom floor. It feels more intimate somehow and Riku likes spreading out his various English notes. He leans on one of the bean bags with his assigned text and a highlighter in hand. Sora lies on his stomach. His feet kick back and forth as he chips away at his essay, taking those dot points he constructed yesterday and assembling them into coherent connected sentences. One ear phone is tucked in his ear. He hums along to the upbeat song it plays. 

“Sora,” Riku starts. He does not look up from his book.

“Hm?”

Riku draws his highlighter across his page.

“Have you… made any new friends? At school I mean.” 

“Oh uh…” Sora tugs out his earphone and leans his chin into his hand. “Not really.” He sighs.

Riku glances up. His mouth pulls into a tight line and he hums with concern.

“That’s not like you.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve always been great at making friends. I feel like you make friends everywhere you go. I’ve seen it happen in front of my eyes like magic.” Riku chuckles. 

“Well have _you _made any?” Sora’s eyes narrow.

“No, but I’m awful at it.” Riku scoffs. “Always have been. I somehow convinced you and Kairi to like me, but no one since. So I’m not surprised that I haven’t made any at school.”

He rolls his eyes and lets his book drop.

“But we’re not talking about me. We’re talking about you.” He smiles sadly. “I guess I just worry about you. Want you to have a better time fitting in at school than me.”

Sora matches Riku’s sympathetic expression. He crosses his arms down on the carpet and lets his head rest on them. He breathes deeply.

“School is hard.” He mutters. “It’s getting better, but it just feels so much harder there.” 

Riku reaches out to touch his back. He rubs it in soothing circles. Sora sighs under his touch.

“Some of the guys have been including me more lately, but I have a hard time telling whether they are genuine or not. I don’t get their jokes. I don’t know if they actually _like _me or are just pretending as a prank or something.”

“Boys are terrible.” Riku preaches. Sora turns his head and looks up at him with a smirk. 

“But I think they do probably like you. You’re nice. You’re cute. Everyone will see that soon.” 

He lightly pinches the back of his neck.

“But stop ditching or they’ll never get the chance.”

“Alright, alright.” Sora laughs. He rolls over onto his back and places his hands behind his head. 

Riku looks down at him with a soft smile. Haloed in the ceiling light, his silver hair glows almost translucent. He reaches over to tug down Sora’s shirt that has hiked up on his stomach. His fingertips brush Sora’s bare skin and the contact sends thrums of anticipation through his veins. He giggles.

“Ticklish!” He curls in on himself and rubs the spot Riku had just brushed, trying to force his skin to forget the feeling. Riku smirks.

“Get longer shirts then.”

“Augh, all my old clothes are too small now. I need to get more.” He eyes Riku’s stray t-shirts and trousers in his laundry basket. “Or just steal some more of yours.”

“You’re welcome to my hand-me-downs any day.” Riku smiles. His bright aqua eyes flash with affection and Sora feels warmth pool in his stomach. He makes a note to steal as many of Riku’s clothes as he can if it makes him smile like this.

“You should get some more friends too.” 

“Fat chance.” Riku scoffs. “You’re more than enough.”

Sora smiles so wide at that it almost forces him to sit up. He manages to keep his composure.

“Obviously I will be the _best, _but I know you could make some more if you wanted.”

Riku frowns with doubt. Sora lightly pushes his side.

“I mean it. I heard some girls talking about you today. They seemed interested in getting to know you.”

“Know me _how?_” Riku scowls.

“Well… they said you were really hot.”

Riku’s disgusted expression sends Sora into a fit of giggles. He has not seen Riku that repulsed since he accidentally ate snails at The Bistro in Twilight Town.

Sora turns on his side towards his friend as the last few giggles ripple through his body. Riku looks unimpressed. Sora smiles sleepily up at him and exhales several puffs of air in attempt to blow several stray hairs out of his eyes. Riku reaches over to tuck the strands out of the way. His fingernails pleasantly scratch against Sora’s temples.

“Hey Riku,”

“Hm?”

“Have you ever had a crush on anyone?”

Riku snatches his hand away like he’s been burnt. His eyes shoot wide. He looks at Sora with fearful, hesitant eyes, but Sora still wears the same dopily content expression. Riku clears his throat.

“Uh…” He starts. “Yeah?”

“What?” Sora scrambles into a seated position. “Who?”

He feels like a bucket of ice water has been dropped on him. Tense and suddenly alert. His fingers dig into the carpet.

“It’s a secret.” Riku presses his finger against his lips with a smirk. Sora groans. He inches closer and lightly shakes the larger boy by the shoulders.

“But best friends aren’t supposed to keep secrets from each other.”

“I’m allowed _some _secrets.” Riku laughs. “Why are you asking anyway?”

“Does it feel nice?”

Sora’s unusual question throws Riku for a loop. It takes him a moment to gather his thoughts. Usually, he can anticipate Sora’s next action or statement, but now he feels like he’s treading water. Just barely rolling with the questions that are coming at him. He sighs.

“It hurts.” He answers. Sora’s face falls.

“Oh.”

“But in a good way?” Riku reassures. “Like it kind of aches in the same way waiting for Christmas morning does? Or like watching a cooking show when you’re really hungry. I rather have these feelings… than not?” He shakes his head. “Am I making sense?”

“Not really.” Sora laughs.

“Ah.”

Riku looks at his best friend, now sitting across from him, cross legged and attentive. Sora looks like he has more he wants to ask, but he’s hesitating. He wants to continue this topic of conversation, but is not sure where to go.

“Do _you _have a crush, Sora?” He tries. Sora sags with an exhale and leans back against a bean bag.

“I’m not sure. Roxas seems to think I do, but I don’t really know what he’s talking about.” He pouts.

“That’s ok.” Riku smiles. He pats Sora’s knee. “You can figure it out in your own time. It’s not like there’s a rush or anything.”

But Riku’s gentle words do little to dissuade the confusion in Sora’s head. The smaller boy continues to scowl and the wrinkles in his forehead do not relax. Riku reaches out to touch him on the shoulder.

“I saw a box of brownie mix in your cupboard. Wanna help me make them?” He quietly offers. Sora slowly begins to smile.

“Alright.”

Riku stands and pulls the smaller boy onto his feet. He catches him with one arm over his shoulders in a sideways hug.

“Don’t let Roxas get you down. He’s not even two years old.”

Sora chuckles as he’s pulled out to the kitchen. 

…

After dinner, brownies, and several aggressive rounds of video games, Sora begins to droop in his bean bag. His eyelids become heavy and he misses several minutes of the cartoon they are watching.

“Tired?” Riku smirks from his nest of sleeping bag, pillow and blanket. Sora’s eyes snap open.

“No.” He croaks.

“C’mon.”

Riku shuffles him into the bathroom to do his teeth, while he changes into his pyjamas. They are his usual pair of flannel pants with a surfboards print, and a threadbare singlet. Sora comes out of the bathroom and they swap positions. Riku has a permanent stash of toiletries in Sora’s house for exactly this reason. He returns to the bedroom to find Sora in his red sleeping t-shirt and overstretched basketball shorts, fixing the blankets on the bed.

“Guess we’re staying here tonight then.” Riku chuckles. He hits the main lights as Sora turns on a small lamp.

They climb under the crisp sheets, knees and shoulders bumping against each other, before Sora reaches across and turns out the lamp. He stays on his side, trying to get comfortable, but he can feel the heat from Riku’s chest just a mere inches away. His side of the bed suddenly feels freezing. He knows he can press himself back into Riku’s space, but even that will not be enough to satisfy him. He wants to feel that warmth completely envelop him, like stepping into a hot spring.

With a frustrated huff, he reaches behind his back and grabs Riku’s arm. He drags it over himself until it is securely wrapped around his middle.

“Cold?”

“Mmm.”

Riku chuckles deeply and wraps his arms around Sora, pulling him tightly against his own chest. Sora exhales. He melts against Riku’s chest. The weight of Riku’s arms against his waist and shoulders makes him feel secure. He sinks deeper into the mattress. 

“Your arms are nice.” Sora mutters against his pillow. “I can see why girls like them.”

He’s thankful it’s dark as he feels his cheeks heat up. Riku laughs behind him. His breath tickles the hairs on the back of Sora’s neck and his laughter rumbles through his chest and against Sora’s spine. 

“Well they can keep dreaming.” He sighs. “Cuz these are my Sora hugging arms.” He squeezes tighter, adjusting his arms to hold Sora around his stomach. Sora beams.

As they grow quiet, and Riku’s breathing grows deeper and more even, his fingers absently stroke up and down Sora’s stomach. He rolls forward as much as he can, letting his full weight press against Sora’s back. His breath fans against Sora’s ear with every exhale. Sora begins to focus on the rhythm of it. The push and pull against Riku’s chest. The comfort of his touch on his bare skin, sending stuttering shocks of electricity along his body. 

If it’s this nice facing away from him, he wonders what it would be like to roll over. To have his chest rise and fall against Riku’s. To drape his own thin arms over Riku’s strong frame. To tuck his face against his neck and let that earthy bergamot scent fill his lungs as he sleeps. To taste his lips-

Sora gasps. 

It takes him hours to fall asleep.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sora is now pretty convinced that he has a crush on Riku.  
But he's still confused. Maybe this isn't a crush at all!  
Better run some tests.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah sorry for the delay but I am happy to finish this finally!  
Augh honestly it's sometimes hard not to get carried away with scenes like this and I had to keep repeating "PG PG keep it PG" in my head at all times haha.

Sora is shook awake and he gets ready for school in a numb haze. Riku manages to pull him out the door and his feet drag sluggishly on the pavement. He rubs at his sleepy eyes.

“Did you not sleep well?” Riku looks over at his friend as he stifles another yawn.

“Yeah.” Sora sighs. “Couldn’t turn my brain off.”

“You have a brain?”

“Hey,” Sora shoves him in the side. Riku laughs and stumbles for a moment, before easily catching himself and drifting back to his friend. He bumps their shoulders. Sora sighs and leans against him. He closes his eyes.

“Hey, hey, don’t fall asleep on me. I’m not carrying you.”

“Mmmm but it would be so easy for you. Cuz you’re soooo strooong.” Sora looks up with a smirk. Riku huffs and rolls his eyes.

“Are you making fun of me now?”

“No, no, not at all. I’m complimenting you.”

“Uh huh.” Riku scoffs.

With their shoulders still connected, their fingertips brush lightly as their arms swing back and forth. Their pinkies catch. Sora looks down at their tangled fingers and officially closes the difference. He laces their fingers together and it's comfortable. Riku’s much larger hand surrounds his securely. Rough callouses rub against the soft back of his hand. Sora smiles.

“Are your hands cold?” Riku meets his smile.

“No.” Sora pauses. He chuckles and squeezes Riku’s hand tightly. “I’m conducting an experiment.”

“An experiment?” Riku laughs in a teasing way. He continues to rub his thumb over Sora’s, memorising the feel of the smaller and softer hand in his.

“Can you tell me what your hypothesis is?”

“Not yet. I’m still developing my variables.” Sora taps his chin thoughtfully.

“Ah, of course, of course.” Riku nods. “Well I hope to see your full report at the end of the month.”

“Nerd.” Sora chuckles and bumps their shoulders again. He swings their hands between them, but still does not let go.

It feels nice. A physical tether to his best friend. A pleasant warmth thrums up and down the length of his arm. He’s close enough that he can still smell the scent of lavender soap clinging to Riku’s skin. They keep holding hands along the boardwalk. They manoeuvre past early morning joggers and elderly couples walking their dogs. Sora finds that not only does he enjoy holding Riku’s hand, but there’s a peculiar surge of excitement at being _seen _holding Riku’s hand. It’s an unfamiliar feeling that he doesn’t quite understand yet. He wonders what strangers assume about them. He smiles shyly at a silly thought. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if these strangers assumed Riku was _His._

He sighs and drops his head on Riku’s shoulder. He finds he enjoys being affectionate in public maybe just a bit too much. Riku tries to keep his shoulder steady, but they continue walking. They round a corner and the entrance to their school becomes visible. A familiar bell rings in the distance. Kairi skids her bike to a halt beside them.

“Hey guys. Sora, you sleepy?” She pants. She’s running later than usual and has clearly been peddling hard to catch up.

“Mmmm” Sora hums.

Kairi’s eyes drop to Sora and Riku’s linked hands.

“What’s this about?” She waggles a finger between the two.

“Science apparently.” Riku shrugs. Sora chuckles. He lifts up his head.

They walk through their school gates and Sora reluctantly lets go of Riku to go to their respective lockers. Riku gives Sora’s hand a reassuring squeeze with promises to meet up at their usual place.

Sora walks with Kairi to his locker.

“Why are you so tired?” She asks. “You didn’t sneak off to train with Roxas again did you?”

Sora pulls out his pile of exercise books.

“No, just couldn’t sleep. Thinking about too much.”

“Ah that sucks.” Kairi sighs.

Sora closes his locker and they walk through the halls towards their English class. Sora peers curiously down at Kairi’s open hand between them. He takes it.

Kairi raises a curious eyebrow, but lets Sora lace their fingers together. He chews the inside of his cheek and his eyebrows crinkle together.

“Mmm, not as good.” He reaches his conclusion. Kairi scoffs and takes her hand back.

“Well gee, sorry.” She wipes her sweaty hand on her skirt.

“Ah no, sorry, it was very nice and all-“ Sora begins to apologise. Kairi laughs and waves him off.

“It’s fine, it’s fine. I get it.”

They walk into their English class, which is still teacher-less and chattering away, and take up their usual seats. Kairi pulls out her diary then she perks up with a quiet “Oh!”. She turns towards Sora.

“Did you give Riku that girl’s number?” She asks.

Sora thumbs through his exercise book.

“I lost it.”

“Ah.”

…

When the lunch bell rings, Sora waits for Riku’s face to appear in the doorway. But it does not come. Sora pouts and drums his fingers on the desk as the time ticks by. After five minutes Kairi picks up her bag.

“He probably just got held up after class. C’mon.” She cocks her head towards the door. “Maybe we’ll run into him on our way.”

Sora nods and grabs his books. They cut through a quiet courtyard on their way back to their lockers. The cement bricks sizzle under the afternoon sun, and humidity comes off the damp soil of the flower beds in waves. It’s an uncomfortable place to linger in summer, which means it is abandoned and easy to quickly cut through. Sora is about to hop over a flower bed when he spies a shock of sparkling silver hair in the distance. He almost shouts when Kairi grabs his collar and yanks him behind a short palm tree.

“Look.” She hisses.

Sora peers around the plant to see Riku holding his lunch in one hand and his free hand tucked into the pocket of his pants. He bops his knee impatiently as a girl with soft auburn hair and amber eyes has interrupted him. Olivia.

“Crap.” Sora whines.

“We should leave.” Kairi suggests.

“No way. I gotta hear what’s going on.” Sora grabs Kairi’s wrist and scuttles low through the flower beds until they are just a few metres away, hidden by a particularly large dividing wall and a collection of saltbush. Sora barely breathes as he keens his ear towards the distant conversation.

“Sorry, I don’t think I know you.” Riku’s voice carries through the air.

“No! No you don’t. We haven’t met, sorry.” Olivia appears nervous and she clings to her books in front of her chest.

“I’m Olivia. I’m friends with Sora.”

Sora wrinkles his nose and looks over at Kairi.

“Oh?” Riku visibly settles into a more confident stance. “I don’t think he’s mentioned you.”

“Oh uh….” Olivia sheepishly laughs and gets quiet. “So he didn’t give you my number then?”

“Oh. No. He didn’t.”

A hot wind blows through the courtyard.

“Sora’s kind of forgetful. It’s probably buried at the bottom of his bag and he’ll remember it in a week.” Riku forces a laugh. Olivia smiles.

“I guess I was kinda hoping he’d give me a good reference.” She chuckles.

“I’m sure he will when he remembers.” Riku crosses his arms and smiles.

“But ah….” He huffs. “Maybe it’s better this way. I got to meet you more directly.”

“That’s true. I guess it’s nice to have taken the initiative myself.” Olivia shrugs.

“And it means I can tell you directly…” Riku winces. “That I’m not interested.”

Olivia’s eyes go wide. She exhales and stares at her feet.

“Oh.”

“It’s not personal.” Riku rushes to explain himself. “It’s nothing against you. You seem plenty nice. And pretty.”

Sora scowls behind the bush.

“But my schedule is all over the place. I leave for long periods of time with no notice. I’m graduating at the end of the year, but you’ll still be here for another year. And to be honest I’m not super interested in-“

“Dating?”

“Girls.”

Olivia’s loosens her grip on her books and drops them to hold at her side.

“Oh.” Is all she offers. She seems confused, but miraculously not upset. She blinks several times before she sighs and relaxes, leaning against the wall behind her.

“So you’re gay?”

“Yeah, I think so.” Riku answers curtly.

“You could have just said that.” She chuckles.

“It’s not exactly common knowledge.”

“Well I guess thanks for telling me.” Olivia cocks her head to the side in interest.

“So is Sora _more _than a friend then?” It’s an innocent enough question, but it has Riku tensing underneath her stare. He scowls coldly at her and rises up to his full height. He crosses his arms across his chest.

“That doesn’t really concern you.”

Olivia pales and shrinks underneath Riku’s tense gaze. She nervously scratches her arm.

“Ah, right, right, sorry. I just…” Her eyes dart from side to side. “Just wondered if you were dating is all.”

She clears her throat.

“Well it was nice to meet you, Riku.” She starts to shuffle to the side.

“I hope you’re not upset.”

“Ha,” Olivia laughs and rolls her eyes. “I’m fine. You’re pretty, Riku, but…” She shrugs. “Not worth me getting upset over.”

Riku chuckles quietly.

“That’s good I guess.”

“I’ll see you around.”

Olivia jogs off. Riku heaves a huge sigh when she is out of sight. He sits on the garden wall and runs his hands through his hair, catching his breath and composing himself. His heart thunders in his chest.

Why the hell did he just come out to some random girl?

Sora crouches, frozen and barely breathing, still hidden by the bushes. His thighs burn and shake from squatting so close to the ground for so long, but he does not dare move. He feels his mind go blank with the mixture of relief, excitement, and worry that now swirls like a storm. Hearing Riku reject Olivia had sent a rush of relief through him, but the after effects of happiness and excitement came to a grinding halt when Sora realised just how desperately he wanted Riku to reject her. He would never say it out loud, but now he has to admit it to himself. He needs Riku to stay _his._

“Are we going?” Kairi whispers.

“Count to 30.” Sora requests. They can’t just pop up immediately. It would be too suspicious. So Kairi counts.

“28, 29, 30.” She breathes.

With quaking legs, Sora pulls himself to his feet. He takes slow, unsure steps towards Riku. Kairi briefly claps him on the shoulder and smiles softly before moving ahead.

“Riku!” She cheerfully greets the other boy. His head snaps up in shock. His lips pull into an easy smile when he sees Kairi and Sora.

“Oh, hey.”

“You never showed. We were getting worried.” Kairi explains.

“Ah sorry. Some classmate needed a hand with the homework.” He lies deftly. Kairi keeps her smile.

“Ah ok. Well are you ready to head up?” She holds out her hand and pulls Riku to his feet, even though he does not need the help.

“Yeah.” He smiles and fits himself neatly into Sora’s side. He ruffles his brown hair with a grin and Sora feels all his worries evaporate away in the searing sunshine.

“I even brought an extra kit-kat for you.” Riku beams down at Sora.

“The strawberry kind?” Sora’s eyes light up and Riku’s gaze becomes soft.

“Of course.”

…

Riku is not late when the final bell rings. He appears quickly at Sora’s classroom, fighting the stream of teenagers running to escape to their weekend plans already. Riku feels a few barrel into his chest, but he manages to keep upright and walk into Sora’s now empty classroom.

“Ready to go?”

“Yup!” Sora bounces up from his seat and begins to saunter towards the door.

“Hold up.” Riku grabs the back of his backpack, stopping him dead in his tracks. He lifts the bag up enough to feel the weight of it. Or the lack thereof.

“This feels very light.”

“But the weekend is for _training_.” Sora whines. He falls forward until Riku is supporting 100% of his weight by holding up his backpack.

“Yes, training your body _and _your mind.” He huffs and yanks Sora back upright.

“Finish your studies tonight and we can hang with Rox all weekend.”

“Uggghhhhhh.” Sora throws back his head and groans loudly. “Fine.”

Riku follows him to his locker and carefully eyes the different books Sora shoves into his bag, checking off his mental list Kairi had sent him earlier.

“There. Can we go now?” Sora huffs.

“Absolutely.” Riku smirks.

They walk back home and the boardwalk is teeming with visitors on this hot Friday afternoon. Sora pouts at them melodramatically, wishing he was able to join in on the fun already.

“Don’t be so sad. If you get the work out of the way now, then you can really relax later.” Riku explains.

“I know.” Sora huffs. But his frown does not fade.

“Would it help you feel better if you held my hand again? You know… for science?” Riku smirks and holds out his palm.

Sora takes it and smiles gently.

“It helps.”

“Are you ready to publish your results yet?”

“My findings are…”

“Inconclusive?” Riku offers.

“Still being assessed?” Sora shrugs.

“Ah yes of course. If you need any help for this extremely serious and important science you are doing, please let me know.” Riku solemnly nods. Sora giggles and speeds up his pace into a fast jog. He tugs Riku with him.

“Come on, the faster we get home, the faster I can get this over with.”

…

Riku has no homework over the weekend, so he can place 100% of his focus on helping Sora with his. They lay on Sora’s floor, basking in shorts and the air conditioning. Sora lays on his stomach with his math assignment open in front of him. It is a simple open book test, so he can do it in his own time, but when you’ve missed school and your fundamentals are shaky even simple take home tests can be stressful.

“I… I don’t know what this question wants.” Sora stares down at the question. It’s a wordy question with too much set up and not enough clear direction. Tim has 30 apples with a probability blah blah blah, Greg has 250 oranges… All the numbers turn to mush in Sora’s head.

“Let me see.” Riku shuffles from his seated position, but instead of just coming to Sora’s side, he lifts his leg up and over Sora’s back, so that he straddles him and looks at the assignment over his shoulder. Riku stays on all fours, making no actual contact with Sora, but Sora is hyper aware of his presence. His smell after a hot day of school is heady and intoxicating. The skin of his thighs just barely nudges against Sora’s side. He can feel the heat looming above him, and it’s sending his thoughts spinning. He briefly wishes that Riku will collapse and press all of his weight onto him. Let him feel his body all along the length of his back and legs.

“…so you’re just gonna… Sora are you listening?”

“No.” Sora answers honestly. Riku grumbles.

“This question is exactly the same as all the other ones you’ve done before. It’s just asking you in a different way. You need to figure out which numbers go where in the formula.”

“…okay.”

“Read through it and note down all the important numbers. Then insert them into the formula. I’ll watch and let you know if you do it wrong.”

“Okay.” But Sora is finding it immensely hard to concentrate. He manages to write out the formula correctly after rereading the question three times. He clumsily works through the problem and it seems to take every last scrap of his will power.

“There!” He drops his pencil and collapses when he reaches an answer.

“You did it.” Riku chuckles above him. “I knew you could.”

“You know…”

Sora rolls over so now he can look up into Riku’s smug expression. The older boy’s strong arms rise on either side of his head, caging him in.

“It’s very intimidating doing math with someone looming over you like this. It’s uncomfortable. And I’m worried you’ll collapse on me.”

“You mean like this?” With a vicious smirk, Riku’s arms buckle and he falls to lay directly on top of Sora. Sora grunts with the sudden impact and Riku chuckles against his neck.

It’s hot. Feeling Riku’s body press Sora into the floor and his nose against his neck is just… too much…too overwhelming. The intense weight of him. The shape of his hips fitting snugly against Sora’s. His strong thighs sliding in between Sora’s legs. The primal feeling of wanting to wrap his arms around Riku’s neck and pull him closer… He needs Riku to move immediately.

“You’re hot.” Sora groans. Riku huffs another laugh against his neck.

“You really think so?”

“I mean you're sweaty!” Sora paws at Riku’s shoulder until he rises up onto his elbows. Cool air rushes between their bodies and Sora sucks it in with a sharp breath.

“Was I too heavy?” Riku laughs. His hair falls forward and hangs around his ears. Sora reaches up instinctively to twist the strands around his fingers and tuck them behind Riku’s ear. Riku’s teasing smirk falters.

“You know, you never told me why you cut your hair.” Sora’s voice carries up just barely above a whisper. His fingers continue to card through the short strands.

“Just for practicality. I noticed it was a lot easier to deal with when I was your dream eater. I didn’t realise how much I had to compensate for it until I came out of your dreams and suddenly had my long hair again.”

“Mmmm makes sense.” Sora sighs. “I kinda miss it though. It was fun to play with.”

“Well things are more peaceful now. I shouldn’t have to fight so much.” Riku laughs and rolls off of Sora and onto his side.

“Maybe I’ll grow it out again for you.”

“For me?” Sora flushes.

“Sure. I miss you telling me that I’m pretty.” Riku flashes a sharp grin and Sora feels the heat in his face travel down his neck.

“And you care so much about what I think of you.” Sora tries to laugh.

“I only care about what you think of me.”

Sora blinks several times. His eyes widen and his blush shoots down to his toes. Riku continues to sleepily grin at him with half lidded eyes. His hair flutters around his eyes and jaw line. Sora rolls away. He holds his chest tightly and tries to regulate his heart beat. Despite his controlled breathing, it continues to thunder in his chest.

“I-I need to finish my maths assignment.” Sora stutters out.

“Alright, I’m not stopping you.”

“Don’t lean over me again. You make me nervous.” Sora grumbles.

“Alright, alright, I’ll just lay here.” Riku laughs.

And true to his word, Riku stays where he is. He rolls on his back and closes his eyes, taking a small moment to relax and rest his eyes. His breathing becomes even and his face relaxes. He may even fall asleep for a few minutes.

He is still distracting.

Sora manages to tear his gaze away for long enough to speed through the last of his test questions. It likely takes him longer than it should, as he keeps pausing mid question to take in Riku’s sleeping face. His plush lips slightly parted, and his dark, long lashes brushing against his cheeks. His short hair no longer pools around his neck and shoulders like it did when it was long, but Sora supposes that this shorter cut does let him see Riku’s pretty face much better. He no longer hides his eyes behind a curtain of silver. Sora had loved running his hands through it, but he probably enjoys seeing Riku’s open expressions even more.

“Hey,” Sora quietly jostles his shoulder. “Riku, I finished. Look over my answers and help me make dinner.”

With a deep inhale and twitching of his eyelids, Riku comes back to life.

“You awake?” Sora smiles down at his friend. Riku squints away from its brilliance.

“Did I drift off?” He mumbles.

“Yeah. Think you can check my answers?”

“Sure, sure. Give them here.” Riku holds a hand above him and makes grabbing motions. Sora places his test in it and Riku begins to pour through the formulas and working. He ticks through the messy lines of scrawl.

“Good job.” He hands Sora’s test back. “Now let me get back to my nap.” His arm falls over his eyes.

“Riku!” Sora shakes him. Riku keeps his eyes covered but his wide smile is plainly visible.

…

With Sora’s parents both out, the two boys manage to cobble together a pasta dish for dinner. Riku chops up a couple of zucchinis, capsicums, and mushrooms to add to the sauce. Sora sticks his tongue out in disgust.

“You’ve gotta get your vegetables in somehow.” Riku explains.

“Or we can just skip them.” Sora pouts. Riku rolls his eyes and stirs them in.

They finish dinner and decide they still have room for popcorn while they play video games. They play a few rounds of a fighting game until Sora gets tired of losing and switches that off in favour of a single player game. Riku watches with some interest until he opens his phone and starts watching videos. A lot of his recommendations are free-running and stunt videos. He clicks on an archery tricks video and shows Sora the most impressive bits. They lounge on the bean bags, huddled around Riku’s tiny phone screen, giggling and wincing at various martial arts fail compilations until their eyes are heavy. Sora has rolled off his bean bag and gradually inched himself closer, so that he is now wedged between Riku’s legs, with Riku leaning back and watching from over Sora’s shoulder. He plops his chin on top of Sora’s head and winds his arms around his middle. Sora closes his eyes and leans back into his chest. He’s too tired and comfortable to suppress the voices in his head warning him to stop.

“So are we staying here or heading to my place?” Riku asks. His voice is slightly raspy from talking all night.

“Here.” Sora sighs. He’s not in the mood to hike down the road in the cool wind.

“Alright, up.” Riku gently pushes on Sora’s back so he can extract himself. Sora slumps forward. Riku awkwardly clambers onto his feet and pulls off his shirt in a smooth movement. He unbuckles his pants and kicks them off to the far corner of the room. Any sleepiness in Sora’s veins immediately falls away and his limbs go rigid. He watches intently as Riku casually waltzes into the bathroom in just his briefs to do his teeth, then saunters back out to sit on the edge of Sora’s bed. He looks comfortable and confident, almost like he owns the space, as he lays back on the sheets.

“You’re not gonna put pyjamas on?” Sora does his best to keep his voice from squeaking. He used to hate seeing Riku shirtless. He thought it was jealousy that would rise up in his gut, forcing him to compare his smaller frame to Riku’s strong chest and the distinctive lines of his abdominals. He assumed it was just his admiration and pettiness that forced him to stare. Now he isn’t so sure. He does not think that jealousy fills your mouth with saliva or causes heat to pool in your lower abdomen.

“Nah they’re too dirty and smell. Need a wash.” Riku sits up on his elbows, causing his abdominals to flex and shift. Sora swallows.   
“Okay.”

“This okay?”

“Yeah it’s fine. No problem. Just don’t want you getting cold.” Sora tosses his clothes off in a flurry and picks his old shorts and sleeping shirt off the floor. He shuffles into the bathroom and closes the door behind him.

He stays in there for longer than necessary, taking several large gulps of water and splashing handfuls on his face. His skin feels like it’s on fire. Sora has never been very patient and he feels like he’s reaching a boiling point. Something has to give soon. He’s always worn his heart on his sleeve and being unsure of himself or where he stands with Riku is becoming exhausting. He can’t keep going through these bouts of jealousy, fear, and elation at the smallest of events with no one to confide in. He’s drowning.

He finishes up and walks back to his bed. Riku lays with his hands behind his head, but shuffles to the side as Sora approaches. Sora climbs in, still feeling awkward looking at Riku’s bare torso, but too stubborn to show any weakness. He’s done this a million times in his life. He can make it through just one night.

He cocoons himself in the blanket and hits the lamp. The room snaps into blackness.

Unable to see Riku and with the chorus of crickets outside, Sora finally begins to relax again. The cool night air prompts him to bury deeper in his blankets and he pulls his breaths deep into his chest. He’s warm and loose when two arms wrap around his middle. Riku pulls himself flush against Sora’s back and mumbles into his hair.

“…’s cold. Stay close.”

Sora’s body is rigid and his eyes fly open. His jaw clenches tightly. Riku’s bare skin is impossibly soft and smooth against his bare arms and legs. His fingertips graze just below his naval and Sora feels his stomach flip. He wants to run or scream into his pillow, or both. Instead, all he can manage is a shudder and balling his hands into fists.

“Sora? You okay?” Riku can feel something is wrong. Sora is usually fine with physical contact but tonight he feels tense and grips tightly to his sheets, like he’s planning his escape. Riku relaxes his hold and pulls away.

“Riku… I have to tell you something.” Sora’s boiling over. His skin raises into goosebumps and his pulse reverberates all the way up into his throat. His voice is small and strained.

“Okay.” Riku’s eyebrows knit in worry. He pulls back giving Sora some space. Sora rolls onto his back. The moonlight gathers into silvery pools along the planes of his cheeks and forehead. He stares vacantly up at the ceiling.

“I think I have a crush on you.”

The room is dense with silence. The crickets outside have stopped chirping and even the wind has taken a moment of reprieve. Sora does not dare look over to see Riku’s expression. He keeps his gaze trained upwards.

Riku sighs and props his head up with his hand. A hint of a smile pulls at his lips,

“You think?”

“I don’t know.” Sora whines in frustration. He rubs his eyes with the heels of his palms. “Probably? I probably do. It’s very confusing.”

He tosses his arm over his eyes. He doesn’t want Riku to look at him, but he needs to keep talking.

“You’re just so cool. And I think you’re just the best at everything, so it’s hard and confusing to tell if what I feel is normal. Maybe I just think you’re really great. Maybe I want to be near you because if someone as great as you likes me, then I must be pretty special as well.” Sora rattles off.

“And being with you makes me feel special and nice and good. And I like that I’m your favourite person. I think I wanna be close to you, but then being close to you makes me feel like I might throw up.”

Riku stifles a chuckle.

“Are you making fun of me?” Sora grumbles.

“No, no, Sora. It’s just kind of funny.” Riku collects himself. He leans forward and manages to pry Sora’s arm away from his eyes. Sora’s eyes are glossy from tears of confusion. Riku swipes them away with his thumb.

“Do you want me to leave?” He asks. Sora’s hand snaps to grab his wrist.

“No. I don’t.”

Riku hums and purses his lips.

“Do you want me to kiss you?”

Sora blinks up with wide eyes and a small wheeze escapes his throat.

“I mean just to see. Like as an experiment you know?” Riku talks very quickly in the hopes that Sora will stop looking so terrified.

“Like just to see if you like it? Then maybe you’ll understand your feelings better?” Riku smiles sympathetically. Sora chews on his lip in thought. His eyes move between Riku and the sheets.

“Okay.” He whispers.

“It won’t hurt.” Riku teases as he rises up and presses himself against Sora’s side.

“I know that.” Sora snaps.

“Then stop looking so tense.” Riku laughs. Sora rolls his eyes and begins to relax into the mattress. Riku smiles wider.

“Tap my shoulder if you want me to stop okay?” He brushes stray brown hairs out of Sora’s face and lets his fingertips travel down Sora’s jaw. His hand comes to rest at the base of Sora’s neck.

“Okay.” Butterflies resurface in Sora’s stomach. His legs tremble.

Riku sits up and swings a leg over Sora’s waist. Theres a thick layer of blanket between them and Sora silently thanks the universe for that small reprieve. He tries to stay loose and calm sprawled out underneath Riku. He counts and controls his breathing.

Riku lowers himself until his forehead touches Sora’s. He holds him securely at the base of his neck and shoulder. The smell of heady bergamot immediately invades Sora’s nostrils and burns his lungs. His stomach clenches.

“You ready?” Riku asks. He’s taking his time with this and Sora really wishes he’d just get on with it.

“Yes.” He tries to hiss but it comes out as more of a gasp.

“Okay.”

Slowly, gently, Riku moves his hand at the base of Sora’s neck to cup his jaw and tilt it upwards. With his eyes closed tight, Sora follows the motion until he feels Riku’s lips press against his.

All air leaves his lungs and he’s suffocating. Riku moves his lips over Sora’s and sinks his body down to press against him. His fingers move up to trace hypnotic circles against Sora’s scalp.Sora does his best to reciprocate any kind of contact, but he can’t seem to remember how to move. He barely manages to follow Riku’s lead and angle his head to the side to let their lips slide together easier. He can feel his heartbeat in his ears.

Riku pulls off with a soft pop of their lips. He rises up to sit across Sora’s lips. Sora gasps loudly as soon as cold air hits his body again, and his chest rapidly rises and falls. He still can’t open his eyes. His head is tilted back, exposing the soft column of his neck.

“How was that?” Riku asks. He swallows to keep his own breathing in check.

“I can’t breathe.” Sora pants.

“Oh! Uhh…” Riku tenses nervously, worried he’s done something wrong.

“No like…” Sora huffs out a laugh and smiles. He cracks open his eyes. “In a good way.”

Feeling like he has reached the peak of the river and survived the waterfall, Sora lifts up on his elbows. Emboldened by the adrenaline in his veins, he clasps the bad of Riku’s neck and guides him back on top of him. Riku fluidly moves with him to neatly line up their bodies and lips again. He smiles into the kiss. Sora sighs deeply at the reignited contact.

He wraps his arms around Riku’s neck desperate to have him closer. He moves his mouth tentatively against Riku’s, eventually parting his lips to suck in a quick breath. Riku, drunk on his taste, misunderstands and softly licks inside Sora’s mouth. The feeling startles Sora, but in the most delighted way. He opens his mouth wider and meets Riku’s tongue with his. The wet slide sends fireworks off behind his eyes. Something snaps inside of Riku, and he’s lapping at Sora’s mouth greedily. He sucks on his bottom lip and slides his tongue against Sora’s like a man starving. Sora runs his hands up and down his naked sides. The smoothness and flex of muscle is intoxicating, but it’s not enough. The blanket he had initially been thankful for, is now his most hated possession. He presses against Riku’s bare chest until he lifts up just enough that Sora can kick the blanket away.

“Okay,” Sora breathily states, telling Riku that he can resume kissing him. Riku obliges with gusto. He slips his hands underneath Sora’s shirt and hikes it up to his neck, so when he lowers himself down their bare chests touch. Sora keens into Riku’s mouth at the contact. He arches his hips up against Riku, who firmly pushes him back down into the mattress with his pelvis. Riku stops swallowing Sora’s pants to kiss along his jaw, until his face is neatly fitted against Sora’s neck. He places sloppy kisses at the base of his ear.

“Sora,” His voice sounds ragged. Sora shivers. “Do you have a crush on me?”

“Yeah.” Sora laughs breathily. “Like a really, really, big one.”

Riku moves to mouth at his throat. His teeth graze against his pulse and Sora sucks in a sharp breath. Riku lifts up until he is on his elbows staring down at Sora with gleaming, bright eyes. His lips are swollen, glistening, and his silver hair glows around him like a halo in the moonlight.

“Yeah?” He smiles. It’s sweet and Sora imagines it tasting like honey on his lips.

“Yeah. A huge one. The biggest crush that there ever was.” He places his hands on Riku’s hips.

“Well good cuz… I’m never going to stop kissing you.”

And true to his word, Riku descends on Sora again in a fit of giggles to kiss him until the early hours of the morning.

…

The gummy ship is late descending into Twilight town. Roxas taps his foot impatiently as he watches the ship land behind their building and its occupants begin to disembark. Sora toddles out with his key blade and a brilliant smile.

“Hey!” He waves.

“You’re late.” Roxas huffs. “It’s already 11.”

“Sorry we slept through the alarm.” Riku steps off the ship. Roxas and Xion both note the obvious bags under his eyes. Sora has them too, though his happy expression does a better job at disguising them. Kairi leans out the passenger window. She looks… fine.

“C’mon we’re already behind schedule. Just load up.” She calls out.

“Yeah, alright.” Axel taps Riku’s shoulder with the back of his hand. “Keys.”

Riku tosses the keys in the air and Axel deftly catches them on his way to the driver’s seat. He settles next to Kairi with a good morning and a smile. Xion sits on the other side of him. The rest of the boys scramble to sit in the back.

The ride is eerily quiet. Riku and Sora seem to only have eyes for each other, more so than usual, and converse in hushed whispers. Their hands rest on top of one another in the space between them, and their thighs press against each other. Riku reaches over to pluck a wild piece of grass out of Sora’s hair and Sora visibly blushes. Roxas watches the entire interaction with narrowed eyes.

“So… Sora,” His voice cuts through the silent ship. “Did you finally realise you have a big giant crush on Riku?”

Riku’s fingers freeze in Sora’s hair. They both stop and flush bright red. No one breathes and the cabin is only filled with the low thrum of the engine.

Xion wheels around in her seat and delivers a swift kick to Roxas’ side.

“Rox!” She hisses. Axel is turning blue next to her, desperately trying not to burst out laughing. Kairi loudly gasps and spins around.

“You! _You’re _the one who finally gave him that nudge?!” She stares at Roxas in awe. He nurses his bruised side and shrugs.

“Naturally.” He seems proud of himself.

“I thought Sora would die before he realised.”

“Honestly, I don’t know how you tolerated it for so long.” Roxas leans back in his seat. Kairi laughs.

“They’re sweet boys, but spook easily. I was clearly too delicate with them.”

“Hey!” Sora bristles. “Stop talking about me like I’m not here.”. He crosses his arms in front of his chest. He’s trying to look aggressive, but his face is still beet red.

“And did everyone know?” He voice breaks.

“Raise your hand if you knew Sora was in love with Riku” Axel drawls, without looking away from the steering wheel. He immediately raises his hand.

Along with everyone else.

Including a sheepish looking Riku.

“RIKU?!” Sora guffaws.

“I couldn’t push you! You had to come to this conclusion on your own!” Riku explains. He nudges Sora’s jaw with his nose and places a sweet kiss on his cheek. Sora does his best to not immediately melt into it.

“Please don’t be mad.” Riku smiles and bats his lashes.

“AUGH!” Sora throws his hands up. “Fine! I’ve always been weak to you!”

“Oh, I know.” Riku nuzzles into Sora’s neck, and now with their relationship completely exposed, he wraps his arms around Sora’s waist and pulls him into his lap. He looks perfectly content with his eyes closed and his chest leaning against Sora’s back. Sora keeps his arms crossed and glares at the cabin with a serious expression. It’s an amusing contrast. His small frame still visibly furious, while the larger boy behind him smiles sleepily and affectionately rubs his cheek against the top of his head.

“But as punishment for the rest of you, I am going to kiss Riku LOTS during training! And it’s going to be weird and awkward for all of you!” Sora declares. Riku chuckles behind him.

“Nice going, Rox.” Xion glares at him. Roxas winces and leans back in his seat.

“I can’t believe I just ruined my own life.” He groans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Axel @ Roxas: Congratulations, you played yourself.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys like! I'm on Tumblr @irrevocably-delicious and @irrevocably-voltron  
instagram: @irrevocably_delicious  
twitter: @India_draws


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